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starting count: 0
ending count: 1060
change: +1060
starting line:
“Ally! Look at this!”
ending line:
“I’m fine. It’s just a scratch.” And it was; the cut had stopped bleeding after one single red drop welled out and dropped onto the hair pins. Or she’d thought that was where it had dropped, but as she looked at where they lay on the floor, she could find no sign of the blood. And the scratch on her hand was clean.
darling:
Allegra Ross turned at the squeal from her best friend and shuddered, then burst into laughter. Leigh MacAllister was preening and primping, blinking her eyelashes like something was caught in her contacts and patting the monstrosity on her head as if it were a pet. It might have been a hat, several generations ago. Maybe. Right now, it looked as if Leigh were wearing a silk box that had vomited ribbons and feathers in a series of ill-planned explosions.
“Good lord, Leigh, where did you find that...thing? Take it off and throw it out before it sucks your brain out!” Ally barely managed to choke out around her giggles.
“Throw it out?” Leigh’s eyes bugged out, and Ally wondered for a moment if she were right. “This is a VINTAGE hat!”
“It’s a vintage something, all right,” Ally shot back. “I’m not sure it’s a hat. It might walk off with your wallet if you take your eyes off it.”
**
Take 2. Writing this in 3rd person is at once harder and easier.
ending count: 1060
change: +1060
starting line:
“Ally! Look at this!”
ending line:
“I’m fine. It’s just a scratch.” And it was; the cut had stopped bleeding after one single red drop welled out and dropped onto the hair pins. Or she’d thought that was where it had dropped, but as she looked at where they lay on the floor, she could find no sign of the blood. And the scratch on her hand was clean.
darling:
Allegra Ross turned at the squeal from her best friend and shuddered, then burst into laughter. Leigh MacAllister was preening and primping, blinking her eyelashes like something was caught in her contacts and patting the monstrosity on her head as if it were a pet. It might have been a hat, several generations ago. Maybe. Right now, it looked as if Leigh were wearing a silk box that had vomited ribbons and feathers in a series of ill-planned explosions.
“Good lord, Leigh, where did you find that...thing? Take it off and throw it out before it sucks your brain out!” Ally barely managed to choke out around her giggles.
“Throw it out?” Leigh’s eyes bugged out, and Ally wondered for a moment if she were right. “This is a VINTAGE hat!”
“It’s a vintage something, all right,” Ally shot back. “I’m not sure it’s a hat. It might walk off with your wallet if you take your eyes off it.”
**
Take 2. Writing this in 3rd person is at once harder and easier.
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